The New Recruit "Do Not Do" List

[Niamh Dunlevy]

...Dear Lord, Mac....

I am not sure whether I should post more rules for you to break, or wait until every one on the list is broken.

[Nathan Whyte]

I think add more, give the young lad a challenge!

[Niamh Dunlevy]

Edit (again): I'm just going to post the whole site map.

monster-island.org/tinashumor/index.html

PG-13 content in some of these, by the way. There's a list section, to give you ideas if the "Do Not" list doesn't have enough, and a bunch of other places where you might find inspiration for new "Do Not" rules.

[Niamh Dunlevy]

More rules!

157. May not trap our superiors or equals on the rooftops. When they want help down, we help them down.

158. This also includes pilots. No, they cannot fly like a birdie off the roof.

159. And no betting them to do so.

160. Especially when they're drunk.

161. No spontaneous musicals.

162. Especially in the mess. (If you watch Improv Everywhere, you'll get what I mean.)

163. Yes, this includes the Officer's Mess....

164. No stashing alcohol in the back of planes.

165. Screaming, "I'm going to be sick!" or any other variant for the heck of it in a crowded area will not be tolerated.

166. May not lock all the bathrooms in HQ and hide the key.

167. Especially in the morning, after coffee.

168. This is also true when there is an outbreak of the flu, or any other stomach-crippling disease.

169. May not tamper with the showers.

170. This includes flushing all the toilets in HQ at once during shower time.

[Mac Bargett]

171. Don't make a thread in the brothel area.

[Mac Bargett]

Jan 30, 2009 20:55:51 GMT Heidi said:

59. May not hide important files in the soiled undergarments sections of the barracks' laundry.
60. Or beer.
61. Or cigarettes.
62. Or dog-tags.
63. Or anything else we can think of.

Mar 21, 2009 3:06:19 GMT Mac Bargett said:

Sgt. Mac held up the folder of important documents he had pulled from the pile,

Cigarettes, beer, sandwiches, cans of meat, fruit, a few misplaced dog-tags, and chocolate, all of these things were dumped out of the laundry.

we bundled the treats up in clean clothes before hiding them in the platoon barrack’s laundry.

Feb 8, 2009 1:13:52 GMT Heidi said:

119. No raiding the kitchens at midnight for food.

Mar 21, 2009 3:06:19 GMT Mac Bargett said:

“Nah George, after the raid on the kitchen

I think that's all of them.

[Charles Norris]

Jan 30, 2009 20:55:51 GMT Heidi said:

47. May not report for duty wearing pajamas.
48. Not even if they have camoflauge and insignia, or are steel-toed footsies.

Apr 16, 2009 14:25:48 GMT Charles Norris said:

gave the pajamas a weird camouflage pattern, made all the stranger with the Flight Lieutenant insignia she had decided to sew into the collars.

[Edward"Butcher"McMillan]

172: Playing sports in the hangar area will incur dire consequences.

173: So will herding livestock in the area, or any other area that isn't a certified field of grass

-JT

[Deleted]

174. Thou shalt not join a thread with Hautt unless having plans to punch/stab/decapitate/potato him sometime during the course of the thread.

175. Thou shalt not laugh at rule #107 & #108. They are necessary to ensure the survival of all.